Lying is bad….

…but. If you must do it (and let’s face it, there ARE times when you need to.) here’s a few helpful hints to ease the process.

1) The Costanza rule. As stated by George Costanza, “It’s not a lie, if you believe it.” (see also the 1986 NY Mets “Ya gotta believe!”) Basically you’ve got to believe in your lie and have confidence it will work, all the time, every time.

2) Have said lie/excuse prepared in advance whenever possible. Don’t lie on the fly. Keeping a mental excuse rol-a-dex is a must.

3) NEVER volunteer information. Keep things simple. Answer any questions with the least amount of information necessary.

4) Avoid involving others in your lie/excuse. Karma counts. It’s perfectly acceptable to say you missed work because you were sick when you just wanted to stay home and play video games all day, but faking a child’s illness as an excuse is bad and WILL come back to bite you in the ass.